Many adults who identify with these terms do come for counselling related to something associated with identity. Other adults attend counselling for issues unrelated to their sexuality. Almost always, issues are compounded by the effects of the stresses and strains individuals have experienced, or are still experiencing, from dominant attitudes in the dominant culture, including homophobia and heterosexism. If you want the help of a professional, seek counselling from someone who is familiar with this clientele, is versed in traumatic situations involving homophobia and heterosexism, has experience working on individual, couple, and family issues with this community and accepts their whole person, including their sexual identity.
Many LGBTTQQ youth and their loved ones generally seek counselling about the cascading issues and stages of coming out and transformation, and the myriad of issues they face. It is not unusual for youth to come out to a teacher before services of a counsellor are found. Parents often bring youth for counselling about another issue and as part of being in a safe environment, a youth shares something about sexuality. It is important that that counsellor you choose expresses a non-homophobic response or approach. Find a counsellor who is experienced with transition and youth and where that professional has insight into their own values and beliefs, and how they can affect clients. Also seek someone who is also familiar with cultural and religious beliefs and possible conflicts.
Young persons emerging into adulthood already face a stressful developmental time. Experts in the field such as Gonsiorek and Rudoph say that in addition to negotiating their own emotional, mental and physiological changes, young persons also face negative labels, stereotypes and stigmatization. They often suffer in silence not feeling safe to share; these feelings add to the despair and angst they already feel and that affects school, relationships, mood and coping. Meeting with a good therapist helps those in the transformation grieve, develop coping strategies, reframe rejection and anger from others and manage the renovation of their lives
Counselling for Parents & Family Members /LGBTTQQ
You thought you knew your child or family member before the news was revealed. (You still do). He or she is the same person you knew and loved before you found out this new information. The arrival of this news feels daunting and is not easy for anyone. Your child or family member did not make a choice to be gay. Who would intentionally choose a sexual orientation that elicits such negative reactions? Disclosure to a parent or loved one is often a tremendously stressful event. Despite the challenges ahead, disclosure is emotionally and psychologically health. Research shows that parental attitude, unawareness, or disapproval has an adverse impact on homosexual individuals and their relationships. Due to this pressure, some people conceal their sexual orientation from their families for decades to avoid negative reactions at the risk of mental and physical injury to self.
A common reaction is shock, shame, self -blame, confusion, grief, fear of the loved-one’s safety and disappointment. The coming out person needs the family more than ever but it is at this time that they are met with stern reactions from others that sometimes lead the family member to cut off communication. Family members may put up a wall to take some time to digest the news, or to pressure the person to “come around”, “find a good mate“, or renew ties with a religious organization. Research shows that a majority of parent attitude in this situation improve over time. Researchers also note that the more a parent learns about LGBTTQQ, and the more they hear about their loved one’s personal
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